President's Perspective: We have a chance to be courageous and find a way forward

Posted Date: 04/21/2021

By Lori Blake

KASB President

What originally started as a family ski trip over spring break turned into a seven-day, solo retreat in the mountains when my teenaged boys decided they’d rather stay home without a schedule, to rest, fish and earn some extra spending money. I headed west after their spring break ended on a quest to relax, reflect and reset. For the first time in my life, I went on vacation by myself without a schedule or any plans beyond where I would rest my head at night. 2020 had already sent me on a journey of isolation and introspection, so this trip had strange timing. What I found through adventures in the crisp Colorado snow, soaking in sulphur springs and reading in front of the fireplace of my condo was calm, clarity and courage. 

Three events led me to finding my voice: a tow from a middle-aged white man in Rocky Mountain National Park; a mass shooting in Boulder, CO; and the completion of a book I hadn’t made time for at home. The tow gave me a glimpse of the polarized country we live in based upon political divide. The response to the shooter walking away in handcuffs from a scene where ten people lost their lives gave me another harsh glimpse into the realities of white privilege. The book gave me a mirror to realize I wasn’t using my voice and hiding behind a mask, framed by the fear that comes from the unknown. 

The calm I felt when discussing why I voted differently than the tow driver gave me great hope for our nation. The 45-minute dialogue was genuine, respectful and authentic. We treated each other with curiosity trying to understand each other’s perspective. I felt courageous to speak my truth and to listen to his. When we parted, it was clear that we both had learned from the other. 

The next day, the shooting occurred and I was sent back to wrestling with the subject of racism and white supremacy. Why did the armed, white shooter walk away when so many unarmed, black people lose their lives? In the last year I’ve read Ibram X. Kendi’s How to Be an Antiracist, Austin Channing Brown’s I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in World Made for Whiteness and Robin DiAngelo’s White Fragility. I have stewed on discussions facilitated by Brenee’ Brown, Oprah Winfrey and Malcolm Gladwell on their podcasts. Because of these authors, I have changed my language to see color for what it is. Claiming “I don’t see color” has the opposite effect of the intention. It disregards each person’s identity. I have learned the issues of color are not unique to America and that many policies creating division originate in discrimination and create poverty. I am learning to separate the person from a racist idea that they have perpetuated. I am seeking relationships that unite voices to be in power over hate, injustice and inequity, not in power over people.  

The clarity came when reading James Bryan Smith’s book The Room of Marvels. It was a gift from my co-worker when my grandmother of 107 years passed away last summer. I hadn’t made time to read it. It is a beautiful interpretation of what heaven may look like. Smith writes about the importance of taking off our masks to fully use the unique gifts we are given. He talks about the importance of walking through pain because those feelings are ultimately rooted from losing the joy that comes from love and deep relationships.  

And that’s when it hit me. I was avoiding the hard stuff because I have been afraid of the pain that may come. Instead, I need to focus on the joy of being in relationship with each other. The discomfort that comes from asking the hard questions brings understanding. With understanding, comes opportunity for real change.   

And that is where you join me on this journey. We have a chance to listen to hear what others are really saying. We have a chance to read and learn what unintended consequences come from our policies. We have a chance to be courageous, to put aside our differences and to find a way forward, together. Whether it’s in our neighborhoods, in our local board rooms or in the Capitol, the only real change will come through open, honest reflection. 

In addition to being president of KASB, Lori Blake is a member of the Southeast of Saline USD 306 school board.